How to Become a Phone Sex Operator

Think you’ve got what it takes to turn your filthy words into cash?

Want to know how to become a phone sex operator?

Despite the abundance of free internet pornography, especially in the live camming sector, premium phone sex services are still incredibly popular with leading chat lines taking more than 40,000 calls a day.

And, with, literally hundreds of thousands of phone sex lines operating internationally, that means there is a huge demand for phone sex operators who can satisfy customers.

In this guide, we’ll show you exactly what a phone sex operator does – and what kind of skills you need to do well in the role.

We’ll also look at what you can earn as an adult chat host and how to get started along with some great tips and advice on making this a successful career choice.

What is a Phone Sex Operator?

Also known as an adult chat host (or sometimes a ‘phone actress’), a phone sex operator (or PSO) offers sexy talk to customers using a variety of contact methods.

Traditionally this has been over the phone but can also include sexting using SMS and instant messaging over the internet.

how to become a phone sex operator

Phone sex operators normally work ‘in person’, meaning they take live calls from customers but there is also demand for recorded phone sex lines.

These audio messages are played to callers at a fixed rate per minute but because they can be used over and over again, operators are typically paid less in commission than for live voice calls.

DateNow

What Does a Phone Sex Operator Do?

Quite simply, phone sex operators are paid to talk to their customers.

In many cases, this is most likely to be about their sexual fantasies and indulging them in some virtual roleplay. This could be anything from narrating a scenario or confessing a sexual secret to enacting suggestions made or giving explicit commands to your caller (known as JOI, or ‘Jerk Off Instructions’.

Whether you use a phone, SMS or webchat to talk to your customers, the concept is pretty standard and relies on the use of words and sound to be sexy.

According to the popular sexting service Arousr, the most popular topics of conversation are:

  • Pegging
  • Jerk Off Instruction
  • Goddess Worship
  • Small Penis Humiliation
  • Domination/Slave Training
  • Mommy Fetish
  • Oral Fixation
  • Hypnosis
  • Fart Fetish
  • Edging/Denial

However, pretty much any kind of kink, fetish and fantasy are fair game for conversation over adult chat lines and it is this which makes the job stand out from other remote sex work.

Due to the anonymity offered over the phone and the ‘disconnect’ that exists without the visuals, many callers are happier to explore more explicit roleplay and fantasies.

It’s worth knowing though, that there are lots of adult chat hosts who report that their regular customers don’t just call to get their rocks off but to make a connection with a real person and to feel intimate with them.

If you want to break through to the real success in this field (see ‘Tips and Advice’, below) it pays to remember this and build a regular base of customers who spend, not just the average 8 minutes per call but, hours chatting to you.

Working in the adult entertainment sector is now a little bit like being a minor celebrity and a lot of customers want to get even closer to their favorite adult hosts and models. As a result, many chat platforms offer the ability for ‘fans’ to follow hosts and to purchase additional content from them.

For those individuals who really want to max out their earning potential, there are ways to build a bigger fan base and monetize the status of ‘celebrity’ by selling digital content which includes pics and clips but also audio recordings.

JOI is always popular as is ASMR, both of which can pre-recorded and sold as downloads to your fans.

When it comes to showing your face, there is absolutely no requirement to do this on any platform but those who share pictures and videos during chats/sexting can usually make a bit more money.

In this way, a phone sex operator can remain wholly anonymous.

what does a phone sex operator do guide to adult chat

How Does a Phone Sex Hotline Work?

Whilst it’s possible to set yourself up as an independent phone sex operator, most people in this industry partner up with a dedicated service provider.

The companies handle all of the marketing and usually have a website in which the profiles of their agents offer customers a huge database from which to choose a suitable chat host to talk to.

Usually offering a toll-free number, customers either select a specific operator from an online ‘catalog’ or simply opt for a ‘type’ of service provider. This could something like a ‘Domina’ or ‘Barely Legal Teen’.

Calls are then directed to the specific host or fielded to an operator who matches the customer’s requests.

The customer phone line is routed through a secure (and often encrypted) service to protect personal details and to capture charging information.

For each minute that a caller remains connected, their account is charged at the advertised rate and, once the call has ended, a percentage of this income is credited to the service provider (net of any call handling charges).

Have You Got What It Takes to Become a Phone Sex Operator?

Part sex worker, part actor and part therapist, a successful phone sex operator must have many skills, some of which can be honed on the job but a few which must come naturally to you.

All genders are welcome and both men and women (and trans people) can be adult chat hosts. The same applies to sexuality though phone sex operators are expected to be fluid in this area depending on their caller.

At the end of the day, the job involves talking and listening to people, selling a fantasy and offering them some escapism from their lives.

pros of being a phone sex operator
Your prime job is to sell your customers a fantasy so they can escape their real life.

So, what qualities do you need to do well on a phone sex hotline?

In no particular order, a phone sex operator needs to:

  • Have a Great Phone Voice
  • Be Talkative
  • Be a Good Listener
  • Be Open Minded
  • Have a Sense of Humor (but an ability to keep a straight face)
  • Be Non-Judgemental
  • Have a Creative Imagination
  • Have a Dirty Mind and a Filthy Mouth
  • Be Friendly and Inviting
  • Have Confidence
  • Be Able to Think Fast

On a practical note, a phone sex operator also needs a quiet and private space at home to be able to work from as well as a phone.

The kind of phone you need will vary depending on the company you partner with. Some will insist on a landline whilst others operate exclusively using VoIP. Most don’t allow you to use cell phones as the quality of calls taken on a mobile network can be patchy.

If you are asked to use a fixed telephone landline then you will most likely be asked to remove all features such as call-blocking, call-waiting etc and remove any answerphone facilities.

what does a phone sex operator need
You’ll be likely to need a landline so think about your choice of handset.

What Can You Earn with a Phone Sex Job?

Whilst there are reports of some women making six figures annually through their prowess as top phone sex operators, the reality is that out of tens of thousands of people who do this kind of work, do so as a part time gig.

As a result, the majority earn less than $10k per annum but there is nothing to stop you from being a full time PSO and making this a primary income.

At worst, most PSOs admit that slow days are still better than working the same hours at minimum wage but they can do so from the comfort of their own home and without the same stresses.

The bottom line is that there is plenty of demand for the work and you get to choose your own hours and rates.

So, if you are partnering with a good phone sex line provider who can offer you a steady stream of callers, there is nothing (realistically) to stop you earning $30,000+.

The pay varies by service provider and the method by which you are chatting to customers plus those PSOs who diversify their income into subscription and adult content sales can massively increase their earnings.

But, in general phone sex operators can get 40-70% commission from the calls they are on which can be anything from $0.50/min to $2/min depending on the rates you set.

If you opt to charge less per minute you might get more calls but a higher rate means you earn more when you do get connected.

Average calls vary by service provider and chat host but can range from 5-15 minutes for typical callers whilst regular and premium users can sometimes notch up some whopping times in excess of 30-90 minutes.

how much can you earn as a phone sex operator

Pros and Cons of Being a Phone Sex Operator

So, before we get into the meat about how to get started in this industry, let’s have a quick recap on some pros and cons so you can weigh up whether you really want to become a phone sex operator.

Pros

Two of the major benefits of working in this industry are the combination of flexible working hours and the potential money you can earn.     

A lot of companies will pay out weekly so you can get a fluid cashflow.

Another big benefit is that you can work from home or anywhere you have a fixed landline with some agencies allowing you to take calls on your mobile.

Some adult chat line agencies and sites offer free training.

Compared to other forms of work in the adult entertainment business, being a phone sex operator is more anonymous and, unless you are using a platform to sell digital content or sharing pics and clips with your customers then, it doesn’t matter what you look like or even how old you are.

There are many women who work the chat lines who are in their 50s and 60s who might find it harder to make similar money in the visually competitive field of live cam streaming.

who can be a phone sex operator
The beauty of being a phone sex operator is that it doesn’t matter what you look like.

Believe it or not but this kind of work can be immensely satisfying.

If you are good at your job and getting repeat callers who provide you with excellent feedback then you can build a reputation and fan following which feels good. How many day jobs paying shitty wages can you name where your customers left you five-star reviews and had a great time in your service?

Whilst no-one can guarantee you a job for life, a phone sex operator can rely on a steady and reliable demand for their services.

Despite the rise of the internet and of live camming services, sexting, adult chat and phone sex is still as popular as ever.

In fact, during these troubled times of rolling global lockdowns and self-isolation, phone sex service providers are seeing a boom in business. And, though things may eventually return to near ‘normality’, men will always still love to masturbate and many prefer to do this to the sound of a sexy woman’s voice.

And finally, being a phone sex operator can be a liberating experience and not only allows your customers to unleash their fantasies but also gives you a license to explore your own.

Cons

Some people find that this kind of work can feel pretty isolating as, unlike working in an office or a store, you will be working alone from home.

Though you obviously spend time chatting to your customers, this is not the same as having colleagues you can moan with round the water cooler about a recent creepy caller. You can combat some of this by joining up with one of the many online industry community forums and groups or by networking through social media with other PSOs.

Though you may see a big difference between this kind of work and other adult entertainment including live camming or escorting but other people in your social circles might not make the same distinction.

The bottom line is that this is a kind of sex work and you might find some stigmatization over your new career.  Be aware of the potential for negativity before you decide to spill the beans to friends and family about what you do.

There’s also no getting around the fact that, on occasion, you may end up connected with some creepy callers who might have a disturbing manner about them or fetish they want you to indulge them in.

If the nature of their kink is illegal then you have an obligation to end the call immediately. As for anything that makes you feel uncomfortable, again you are in control of each call and if a customer is abusive, rude or just creeping you out then you can just hang up.

Which is another negative aspect of the work and some PSOs find it hard to forget some of the things that have been said to them during these ‘off’ calls.

Whilst the chat of the vast majority of customers is racy and dirty there are some who can cross those boundaries which can make you feel uncomfortable.

Being able to switch off from this and handle these kinds of callers professionally is important but not always easy to do. Try to build in some ‘down’ time after a shift so you can try and empty your mind of the day’s calls.

Working as a phone sex operator you are an independent contractor and not employed by the agency or website from who you get your calls.

In this way, you are deemed self-employed which means that you have to handle your own tax affairs.

You also don’t get access to the usual employee perks such as health insurance or a pension. For these reasons, you’ll need to get yourself an accountant and consider saving some of your earnings to cover those additional expenses.

pros and cons of being a phone sex operator

Getting Started as a Phone Sex Operator

Still want to become a phone sex operator?

Great – we’ve put together a simple guide to getting started! Along with some of the best advice we could find from those in the know about how to become a successful phone sex operator.

Research the Sex

You may well be a naturally chatty and gifted speaker with a wide range of interests in erotica, fantasy and fetishes but the chances are that even the most liberal minded among you can still learn from a little research.

From mainstream kinks like BDSM and Spanking to more niche fetishes like Financial Domination, sissification and scat-play, it’s important to understand what’s being asked of you and for you to establish any no-go areas you might have.

For instance, paraphilic infantilism sounds dodgy but is just a fantasy where people role play as adult babies and regress to an infant state.

Often completely non-sexual in content, callers might simply want to be ‘mothered’ and talked to in a nurturing and gentle manner or perhaps have you describe changing their diaper.

Learn (and Practice) The Lingo

If I asked you to write down all the filthy and sexual words you know, it might surprise you to realize that you have far fewer that you’d think and some might be more inappropriate or too formal to use than others.

Do you call cocks, winkies or weiners? Have you got a special word for your pussy? Perhaps you’ve only ever said ‘oral sex’ instead of ‘sucking off’?

The choice of words is really important and using the wrong ones can spoil a moment. Check that your list is adult-friendly and not something a 10th Grader might use.

Even if you already have a good vocabulary of dirty words, many of us aren’t used to speaking these out loud, so it not only pays to learn the lingo but to practice it as well.

Try some of these words out in a sentence and make them sound enticing.

This is particularly good advice if you are someone who is prone to giggling when you use certain words. Laughing when trying to be sexy is one of the fastest ways to ruin the mood and to lose a customer.

how to be a phone sex operator
Think you’ve got a filthy mouth? Learn the lingo and do the research.

Research the Industry

There are hundreds of companies that are recruiting phone sex operators; too many to list them all here so you will need to do your own research. Depending on where you are located may determine who you can work with as many companies only work with domestic operators.

Some good sites to start with are Niteflirt, Arousr, TalkToMe, iWantPhone and Sky Private though many of the adult fan club sites also allow models to sell phone sex services including ExtraLunchMoney.

Check out their charging and payment structure along with any special requirements they might have along with details of whether they are hiring or not.

Once you have a shortlist, it is worth Googling for some reviews to find out what customers are saying about the site. If their reputation is poor then traffic to their service might be affected.

There are always going to be complaints about adult chat lines so don’t get hung up about a handful of these.

These are premium rate lines and some guys feel hard done by when they don’t get what they want. A few sour grapes or a couple of bad PSOs are one thing but if you spot a trend then be cautious about signing up.

Sign Up With a Chat Line Service

Whilst it is entirely possible to run your own adult chat services as an independent, most people choose to sign up with a larger agency who can route calls to them and market their services for them.

Yes, you do have to pay a commission for this and it varies by platform from around 30%-60% being typical.

which phone lines to use phone sex operator

The benefits of using a chat line service are that they use a third party phone number to mask your personal details and most calls are also encrypted.

This protects both you and your caller and ensures that the only way you can be contacted is through the company website and not directly.

Some companies require you to do some of your own marketing (or ‘troll’ the chat rooms for customers).

Make sure you know up front if this is something that is part of your membership to their team. It’s a hard thing to do and with such high levels of demand for the mainstream services we’d not recommend signing up this aspect of the job.

Three good services to experiment with are:

Choose an Alias

Once you have chosen a phone sex company to partner with, you will need to register an account and sign up using your real name and personal details.

This is so they can pay you and verify your identity to ensure you are over 18.

However, most companies won’t expect you to use your real name for reasons of privacy and safety so will expect you to use one or more aliases.

This is your opportunity to create a new persona and should help you get into character and distance your phone sex work from your private life.

Choose something that matches the person you want to portray and that sounds sexy and appealing.

Whilst Jane Smith would never talk about anal play in an elevator with a total stranger, Jennifer Anusfun probably would!

Get Ready To Work From Home

The days of phone sex line companies operating call centres are long gone and most adult chat hosts now take calls from home.

This means that you will need to have a quiet space in which to take your calls and where you won’t be distracted.

Whilst you don’t need a separate room or ‘studio’ like cam models, you should make sure that you are free to speak openly and candidly. Most phone sex operators try to schedule their hours around times when their kids are at school and partner is out.

work from home as a phone sex operator
Get ready to start working from home! No more commute and you can work in your PJs!

Getting The Essentials Ready

As we’ve already mentioned, you will most likely be required to have either a landline or be able to take VoIP calls through your computer.

You should make sure that your line is high quality and free from any noisy crackling or clicks. You might also want to consider using a headset with your phone as this allows you to get comfortable for those longer conversations.

If you are spending several hours on the phone during a shift then a headset can help you avoid neckache as well as letting you go hands-free.

If you use a cordless phone then always ensure it’s fully charged before you kick off a shift.

Practice Makes Perfect

You should definitely practice a lot before you take your first call and whilst some people may find it easy to prepare for this alone, others might appreciate someone roleplaying for them.

If you have a friend or partner you can do this with, great but if not, you could always call one of these lines yourself to hear how it’s done.

Many women are callers to adult chat lines so don’t be nervous and pay attention to how the pros are doing it.

Your First Call

It’s okay to be nervous, a lot of callers often are too but we can give you a little advice about how to prepare for that first shift.

You’ve done the practice and have some idea of the lingo in your head but, before you start, you should give yourself a pep talk and have some go-to phrases and fall back lines ready beside you, like these:

  • You’re so big, I don’t think you’re going to fit inside me.
  • No man makes me feel like you do; you’re so powerful.
  • I can feel how much you want me.
  • I’ve never been so wet for someone.
  • You’re more man than I can handle. I wish I had a girlfriend here so you could fuck us both.

Asking questions can also make the chat go more smoothly, things like:

  • Where are your hands, right now?
  • What’s your favorite way to fuck a woman?
  • Do you want me to undress you?
  • Would you like to watch me fuck myself?
  • Do you like that?

You get the idea but if you are still nervous and your caller isn’t giving much back to you then you can always read some lines from a dirty book.

Top shelf magazines have some great ‘Reader Confessions’ and though you should never rely on these for all your calls, they can help you over those first few hurdles if you get stuck. Just make those confessions your own.

advice on being a phone sex operator
Keep some naughty literature on hand to help you if you get stuck.

Keep your voice lowered, speak slowly and try to sound breathy.

Emphasize those sexy words and play the part of sultry seductress. It might sound strange but affecting those film cliches of biting your lower lip or running your fingers across your face and chest as you talk do wonders at getting you into role.

Once you’ve got a couple of calls under your belt, you’ll soon get into the flow of things and practice really does make perfect.

Tips for Becoming a Successful Phone Sex Operator

Okay, so you’ve got one foot on the ladder and your first shift has made you a phone sex operator.

Congratulations but how do you make the leap from being an adequate adult chat host to becoming a super successful one?

Focus On Every Call

Callers can be spending a lot of money in talking to you so the very least you can do is to give them your undivided attention.

You might think you can crack on with the housework or check your emails whilst you are on a call but most customers are pretty perceptive. If they think you aren’t paying attention or ‘into’  the fantasy you are creating then they’ll just hang up.

That means a loss of a call and possibly some bad feedback.

You should make each client feel as though they are the most important thing in your world at that moment.

how to be the best phone sex operator
Listening is one of the KEY skills you will need.

Listen Very Carefully

Though you might think every call is about the same end-result, the truth is that every call is different and it’s your job to work out what your caller wants.

Yes, there are definitely a large proportion of calls you’ll handle where a guy will already be jacking off when you pick up and needs little more from you than a few moans in the right places and a few filthy but encouraging words.

Just remember though that callers who become regulars are those whose needs you meet more fully. And these are often the guys (sometimes girls) who want to discuss more than just sex. Sometimes these are people who genuinely need someone to talk to and may bring up some sensitive issues.

So, listening is absolutely key.

Dress Up & Set The Scene

When working from home, there’s every temptation to stay in your pjyamas and get comfy but it really helps in this line of work if you can dress appropriately.

Yeah, we know they can’t see you but looking sexy helps you feel sexy and, in turn, this can make you sound sexy too.

If you treat every call as if it were a date and try to establish a sensual mood then you should find it easier to get into the zone. This can also help set a more sedate pace for the call which, in turn, will earn you more money.

Put on some lingerie, light a candle, dim the lights and get comfortable. If you are in the scene then your imagination can focus on the good stuff.

tips on being a phone sex operator
Setting the scene and getting into character can really help you nail your technique.

Build a Stock of Characters

We’ve already said that being a phone sex operator is a bit like being an actor and it’s true that the more successful chat hosts establish some characters that they ‘play’.

Taking on a different personality helps you distance yourself personally from the job so you can keep your private life separate but also allows you to offer a better range of experiences for your callers.

Spend some time building these personas and practice playing these parts so you can bring them out whenever they are needed.

If you imagine yourself in the story you’re discussing, then you can pretend that it’s not you who is talking and any reservations you have will simply fade away.

For example, if your caller wants you to dominate him, then build up a character in your head and take on her personality. A dominatrix would be sexy, quick-witted and cruel – so you can pretty much say whatever you like. Don’t hold back- be full on.

Keep Researching and Preparing

After a few months, it can become pretty samey at times although most phone sex operators are still surprised by the variety of things that callers can request.

But, for the most part, even you will get bored by the same old lines you keep feeding different callers. And, the problem is that, if you get bored then you could lose the interest of your customers.

Stay fresh by injecting some energy and creativity into what you do. You might do this by reading some new source material or working on a different ‘character’ to try out with your customers.

It’s got to be fun for you too so don’t be shy about reinvigorating your routines.

Keep Records

Obviously, you need to keep business records of your payments and working hours but what we mean by this is to keep track of regular callers.

On sites where users can request to speak directly to you or pay your tributes and tips via your profile then it definitely pays to give these callers more attention.

Whilst you won’t have personal details about their identity, keeping track of their favorite fantasies and topics for discussion will go a long way to making that bond stronger.

Remember the more intimate you can make a call feel for the customer, the greater the satisfaction and the higher the chances of getting good feedback and a repeat call.

being a phone sex operator

Slow Things Down

You get paid by the minute on these calls and though we would never suggest that you ‘stall’ for (or waste) time there are some tricks of the trade to help you give your callers a more memorable experience.

Quite a lot of the time, a caller will already be jerking off when you are connected and they are just after the sound of a sexy voice to take them over the edge.

These calls are difficult to pace any differently and will invariably last a few minutes before the inevitable hang-up.

However, if you can read a caller right, you should be able to toy with them using edging techniques. 

If you don’t know about this method of orgasm control then definitely add it to your research. If you are using JOI as your main method of making callers happy then why not really take the lead and try to eke out their climax?

Prepare to Be Shocked

And finally, there are always surprises in this industry and callers can come up with some extremely unusual requests which, at times, seem pretty funny.

Though a natural reaction to embarrassment as well as absurdity, you really have to not laugh.

Having the integrity to just go with a request is difficult but this level of professionalism is key.

Anecdotal stories include men who have asked phone sex operators to act like sex-starved squirrels or make the sounds of a water buffalo. All good clean fun, right? Just roll your eyes, stifle that giggle and play along.

The exception to this is where a caller’s request breaks your own rules on what you find acceptable or if this strays into an area of activity which is against the law.