Ever wondered how to become a findom?
Looking to find a paypig?!
Perhaps becoming a financial dominatrix is for you.
Believe it or not but there is a genuine market for women who are prepared to take and spend the money given to them by men (often referred to by fellow fandoms as paypigs!).
This is not the same as becoming a ‘kept woman’ or sugar baby. The exchange is for behaving in a controlling and dominant way.
Yes, financial domination is a real fetish and men (and it is usually men) want to be used and abused financially by powerful women.
Though a sexual fetish, this kind of relationship rarely involves any physical contact or sexual services at all.
In this feature we take a closer look at the fetish that is ‘findom’ and just what it takes to become a financial dominatrix with an army of paypigs.
Want to jump straight in to the findom world?
Here are two sites to consider:
Not as ‘in your face’ as a typical FinDom site, but one of the largest communities of its kind. Seeking Arrangement connects rich individuals with the ‘elite and beautiful’. Its premise is simple: mutually beneficial arrangements.
FinDom is one of the largest financial domination communities in the world with hundreds of members active at any given time. Whether you’re the pay pig or the FinDom, you’ll find the exact crowd you’re looking for here!
What is Financial Domination?
Catering to a very specific kind of fetish, financial domination (also known as money slavery, wallet rape or ‘findom’) is a practice in which the submissive gives gifts and money to their Mistress/Dominatrix/Domme.
The submissive can often be referred to as a finsub, paypig, human ATM, money slave or cash piggy whilst the Dominant may be called a findomme, money Mistress/Master or cash Mistress/Master.
A form of humiliation, the relationship between the Dominant and their sub in financial domination can sometimes extend to other sexual practices which can include BDSM or other fetish play but is often more simply an exchange of power.
In this way, the practice is very different to a relationship or agreement between a sugar baby and a sugar daddy/momma where the payment of gifts or cash are largely done so with an explicit expectation of sexual/physical contact.
Financial domination can take place remotely, often online, where cash slaves will ‘worship’ their Master/Mistress with gifts and donations.
It can also happen in person with a submissive accompanying their findomme on shopping trips to physically witness their money being spent or meeting at an ATM to hand over cash.
As with all fetishes, there is a sexual exchange happening here and the money slave will be aroused by their money being spent just as a findomme may become erotically charged by being worshipped in this way.
The exchange is known as being ‘rinsed’ or ‘squeezed’.
Financial domination can be between partners of any gender and sexuality but is most common between male subs and a female Dominatrix.
In short, financial domination is all about men paying handsomely for powerful women to drain their pockets and control/humiliate them and all (usually) done with zero physical contact.
Sound like something you could do?
How to Become a Financial Dominatrix?
Though the role of findomme sounds perfectly easy, it doesn’t suit everyone nor is it as much of a walk in the park as it might seem.
The idea of having strangers pay you for being bossy, controlling, powerful and mean to them might appeal to many but the reality of the role is more than just taking but requires quite a lot of giving and effort in return.
As many subs will acknowledge, “there is a huge difference between a financial dominatrix and a mean girl demanding money”.
First of all, acquiring a submissive who wants to become your cash slave is no easy thing and subs are looking for someone special to be their Mistress/Master.
In order to want to pay you good money they need to develop a sort of obsession with you.
You need to be confident and assertive with a good understanding of the power dynamics involved in BDSM. You don’t need to be glamorous but most pay-pigs aren’t interested in being abused by someone who cams in their cereal-stained PJs.
The whole relationship is built on fantasy and roleplay and findommes need to be worthy of the worship they receive.
And this is a competitive field with the number of findommes far outnumbering those cash piggies.
Secondly, not all financial domination occurs remotely or online and many findommes meet their subs for a variety of reasons.
Some will incorporate elements of BDSM or other fetish play in their sessions with their subs and mete out physical and psychological rewards in return for money.
It helps if you are someone who is naturally controlling and demanding as trying to fake the role of Domina can be mentally exhausting.
Lastly, it takes a lot of focus and effort to be a successful financial dominatrix and your own personal relationships could be at risk if you aren’t honest with your loved ones.
Many partners don’t feel in the least bit threatened by this line of work but others may not be quite so relaxed about your new career.
What’s Involved: How Do I Become a Findom?
What you offer as a financial dominatrix is down to you and the relationship you build with your subs but these are just some of the ways that findommes interact with their cash piggies:
- Simply acknowledging their existence.
- Consensual degradation over text, phone or video call
- Instructing your cash piggy to perform humiliating tasks and prove this with photo/video evidence.
- Meeting at an ATM to withdraw cash (known as a ‘drain meet’). Some will have their subs kneel down and kiss their heels before they walk away with the money and even include some other form of public humiliation.
- Spending sessions maybe where your sub witnesses you using their cash frivolously or simply hears you spending whilst your phone is in your purse.
- Worship sessions (usually in person) perhaps where the sub licks your boots or lays at your feet. These can also be done remotely with video and phone calls.
- And, more rarely, physical BDSM sessions.
- In some extreme cases, subs want to be blackmailed by their Dommes and will pay handsomely to avoid you spilling the details of your relationship to their partner or going public with certain images.
Many financial Dominas will also charge their subs in a more traditional way for sexting, phone and video calls as well as contact via other means. This can often be using mainstream group live camming platforms where the slaves can ‘Tip’ to remain part of the session.
These sessions can include anything from pouring on the insults whilst they masturbate to (in more extreme cases) using software like TeamViewer to remotely take control over a slave’s bank account whilst they watch you drain it.
However, one of the main ways in which findomme differs from any other kind of sex work is that the gift of money should primarily be offered with no expectation of any kind of reward. Viewed as an act of devotion, submissives are effectively offering financial homage.
As long as the tributes and cash keep pouring in then the choice is yours over how you reward/punish your cash slaves.
You should understand that the relationship between a findomme and their sub is a consensual one and the terms of their exchange are usually agreed in advance.
Forms of Financial Domination
As you can see from the above, findom can take many different forms with some men being happy to be rinsed as a one-off whilst others fork out become regular pay-pigs.
There are some clients who want to relinquish total control of their finances and even give their Mistress/Master access to their bank accounts. They may ask them to devise a budget for them so they only receive a modest stipend.
Some may enjoy having money demanded from them unexpectedly whilst others want to be punished in return for not carrying out their demands. Every cash slave is different and their expectations may also change as a relationship develops.
It is worth pointing out that some submissives ask for a contract or form of agreement up front as a way of protecting themselves against utter financial ruin. This may suit some findommes but is not a common way of transacting business. If you are asked to enter into an agreement then be very careful about the wording of such terms.
What Kind of Money Can You Make as a Financial Dominatrix?
This one is pretty hard to answer as there are countless reports online of women who make tens of thousands of dollars every week to those who simply acknowledge that their lifestyles are entirely funded by their submissives.
There are even reports of extreme findom where women have received single transactions in excess of five or six figure sums with one Domina (Mistress Harley) even claiming that she once took receipt of $1.3 million in a single day!
Editor: Holy fucking shit.
It seems to be an all-or-nothing kind of deal; either women are very successful at this and make it their sole form of sex work or those who try it, don’t make much money and give up.
Certainly, if you aren’t finding that findom is paying you well after at least six months then you are either doing something very wrong or it simply isn’t for you.
What we can say is that this seems to be one of the most lucrative ways to earn money yet, as with all kinds of sex work, there is a lot of hard work and commitment required in order to make it profitable.
Forms of Payment
Money can be taken from a cash slave in a variety of ways and are known (in the trade) as:
Gifts are offered up by slaves to their findommes as a way of pleasing them and are paid for from a list of items which the Dominatrix has made available. This could be personal items she desires or simply gift cards for websites like Amazon. Gifts though aren’t cash, they are payment of a certain item.
Tithes are a regular payment made by pay-pigs and are typically based on 10% of their earnings.
Tributes are an impulsive gift or demand of money made over and above any regular tithings or gifts. These can be made in exchange for something else like a Skype session or may just be a spur of the moment command from a findomme for money.
What Kind of Person Becomes a ‘PayPig’ Financial Submissive?
To understand your role as a findomme, it helps to understand more about the people who will become your human ATMs.
Though mostly men, some women are also aroused by the idea of becoming a cash slave and both genders share some common traits which make them drawn to this fetish.
Financial submissives can often be powerful people at work who control other people and enjoy the freedom of being controlled by others in their personal lives.
The primary motivation seems to be one of relinquishing their own power and authority by escaping into fantasy roleplay.
And money is one of the most intimate and invasive ways to do this.
We are largely a capitalist society and status is very much linked to physical goods and the value of the things we own.
By handing over this status, it becomes a very masochistic act and can be quite kinky for the sub. After all, this is a pretty taboo thing to do. Society expects us to earn money and spend it on ourselves so the very idea of giving it to someone else in this way is quite subversive.
Many get a thrill out of sending large amounts of money and the more they give the larger the rush of adrenaline can be. It can be a risky exchange for them so there is fear tied into the process.
They may also become sexually aroused by being abused, humiliated and controlled and financial domination may also be a form of BDSM for them.
The payment of tributes to their Domme becomes a way of earning attention and rewards with some cash piggies believing that paying to be noticed is the only way they can get women to acknowledge them.
Other men equate the relationship to that of being cuckolded; they aren’t in a relationship with their Mistress but they can get the same sense of arousal by these women spending their money on other dates and then telling them all the details.
Tempting as it may be for some to simply drain the resources of sub after sub, there is a moral responsibility placed on all financial Dominas to understand the limitations of their clients.
No financial dominatrix should really want to ruin their cash slaves and it is important that you remain in control of their spending, even if they can’t.
A sub’s life outside of findom is important to you if you want them to remain a regular source of income to you. Part of your job is to recognize and respect their financial vulnerabilities and not to ruthlessly exploit them.
Saying no can be just as important as any other aspect of your role and knowing when to cut sessions short or turn your back is a crucial element of this kind of work.
It is also your responsibility to understand that financial domination is a means of self-abuse and that there are risks involved with this kind of relationship, including:
- Loss of job
- Loss of property
- Increased debt
- Negative impact on real-life relationships
- Psychological harm
- Physical harm (through self-torture)
Believe it or not but the whole delicate balance of your relationship with your sub takes some degree of care and ensuring that they are okay is an important aspect of your role.
Only through ethical domination can you truly build trust and this is a cornerstone of power relationships in the fetish world.
How Do You Get Started as a Financial Dominatrix?
Still think you’ve got what it takes to be a successful financial dominatrix?
Okay, let’s see if we can’t get you started on the road to findom.
Firstly, unless you are an existing Domina or come to the table with a big following of fans who are into BDSM then becoming a financial Dominatrix isn’t an overnight route to success. You will need to
- Establish yourself as a ‘brand’
- Market yourself widely
- Set up an effective way to communicate with, and be paid by, your subs
Establish Your Brand
If you want to be a financial dominatrix then you will need to establish yourself as one and this takes some effort and research. Whilst we would never suggest that you imitate others, researching how successful findommes have made a name for themselves is the most useful thing you can do with your time.
Check out the profiles of professional findommes and see how they have branded their own style as well as how they are reaching their audience through marketing (see below).
Think carefully about the kind of roleplay you are encouraging and make sure that you are consistent with your theme. Are you a leather-boot, whip-wielding femdom bitch or are you an arrogant princess with an addiction to shopping?
You should have some high-quality photos taken of you rocking this persona (you don’t have to show your face if you don’t want) and hone down the details of your bio.
Until you build up a following and have established yourself in this competitive market you will need to make your profile (and marketing) stand out from the crowd.
Marketing: How To Find A PayPig
Fortunately for you, you are coming to the world of findom in an age where marketing your adult services online is really easy and there are hundreds of ways to gain paypigs as followers.
Cam sites are a great place to find a large crowd in quick time.
Twitter is another way and using a method of high quality, consistent Tweets with great images can build a good fan base. Use hashtags appropriately and always use a verification video/pic so that subs know you are the real deal.
The most popular hashtags are #findom, #paypig and #cashslave but there are hundreds more, so mix it up.
Always post in a way that is consistent with your brand and these should reflect the most powerful and beautiful version of yourself that you can manage.
You can’t post about being a dominant bitch one day and then moan about your shitty job the next day. As a dominatrix, you want to be untouchable. Subs need a Domina who is worthy of their worship not their pity.
Retweet accounts can also be a useful way to widen your audience so reach out to them and get to know other findoms who will share your content. It works both ways so make sure you are consistently sharing.
You should think about having your own website where you can direct traffic from other social media accounts and this should have ways to contact you, details of your financial needs and links to any platforms you use that subs can find you on.
Twitter is a great place to gain followers and attract the attention of pay-pigs but can be a tricky platform to navigate if you don’t want your account to be banned.
Whilst Twitter is far more adult-content friendly than other social media and networking sites they do still have rules.
Always treat your tweets as if they are comments being made in a public space and if you would be thrown out of a coffee shop for saying something out loud then, the general rule of thumb is, don’t Tweet it.
Even DMs can get flagged through the system so try to restrict your use of Twitter to a way of marketing but not for getting into proper communication with your subs.
Instead, transfer your communication to one of the platforms we have listed (see ‘Communication’, below) or use a secure service like WhatsApp, Telegram or even SMS.
Snapchat is another great platform for self-promotion, with Premium Snapchat in particular serving as a great way to make money from paypig subscribers.
Best Findom Sites
Of course, there are some specialist platforms where you can advertise your services as a findomme and start looking for your own cash-piggies.
Some of these are more geared to general BDSM or sugaring relationships but can also offer ways to match findommes with their cash slaves whilst others are more fetish specific.
With over three million members, you should definitely check out Findom.com first.
One of the world’s largest specialist webcam communities for this specific niche, they will charge you a proportion of your earnings but it is a great place to learn the ropes and get in contact with your first submissives.
Other sites worth a visit include:
Useful as these sites are don’t forget that establishing yourself on your own independent website and using fan subscriptions as a way of building your following is key.
However, you will need to choose a way to communicate with your subs and Skype, WhatsApp, Telegram and SMS are all viable alternatives to using a paid platform.
For obvious reasons, and to protect your privacy, it is recommended that you choose an anonymous way to reach out to your cash-piggies and many findommes use a separate email and mobile number for this reason.
As in every form of sex work, there are a lot of timewasters out there so it is important to wheedle these out from the genuine potential subs early on.
The quickest way to do this in this game is to take their money. If they want to be your cash piggy then they need to prove it and most Dominas won’t even give their attention to a client unless they have paid an upfront tribute.
So, you will need a way to receive your money.
PayPal strictly forbids the use of its platform for the transaction of any payment for adult services and it is not recommended that you use them for your tributes. Even if you don’t consider what you do as sex work, they might and could suspend your account.
Some findommes use Amazon wish lists as a way of receiving money and accept Amazon gift cards but if you want to play for big money then you should definitely have an online account with Paxum, Venmo, Verotel or even Bitcoin
When it comes to transferring money directly out of a client’s account into your own then caution is always recommended.
Tips to Become a Successful Financial Dominatrix
And, finally, we’ll leave you with some words of wisdom from those successful findommes about how to make this gig worth your while:
- Slaves can’t pay every findomme they come into contact with so don’t make demanding money be your only conversation. Yes, you will want a tribute to prove they are worthy of your attention but do get to know more about your potential cash piggy.
- Which means, listen to your subs and learn all you can. Only by doing this can you get into their head and find out what makes them tick. This will pay off in the long run as you can turn this to your advantage.
- Play into people’s fetishes for the best chance of bigger tributes.
- Maintain your presence at all times; subs are buying in to your brand and you have to be consistent with what you are giving them. It might be hard to summon up your inner bitch some days but find her.
- Be consistent with your marketing. Yes, you may well have dozens of pay-pigs right now but they could easily slip away and without a steady stream of advertising you will have to start over if they do. Tweet, post and share yourself online. If you are busy and can’t take on any more subs then this makes you more appealing so stay visible.
- Be powerful, not pitiable!
- Don’t be needy in order to gain followers. Yes, the early days of establishing yourself can be slow but reaching out to subs goes against what you are trying to achieve. If you are contacting them first and trying to wheedle yourself into their world then the roles will have become twisted. That doesn’t mean to say you can’t, just handle it with the right level of superiority and confidence.
- Be ruthless and greedy but respect the code of ethical domination.
- Be natural and enjoy what you do. Subs are surprisingly good at knowing when people are faking it and if you don’t enjoy being mean and degrading others then it will show.